Embracing Place

2/28/2019

Dear Daughters,

The day after we got married, your father started reading a novel to me, Hannah Coulter by Wendell Berry.  He read it aloud as we prepared meals on our honeymoon and as we sat by the fire on some of our camping trips together in the Virginia mountains.

 It was such a gift for me.  This book impacted me profoundly and I know it was providential in setting the trajectory of our married life together.  Now I see that it was also foundational in God’s gently forming this inspiration in me for this project “the place she made”

The theme of “place” in the story deeply resonated with me and it has continued to stay with me the past five years.  

For as long as I can recall, I have had a longing for rootedness, a sense of some permanency and the security and freedom that I presumed that would (could?) come from that…

A longing for permanency

From what I can sense, some of this intense desire comes from the instability that is a part of growing up in divorced families.  There were separate residences, and because there wasn’t just one home, I now realize there was a feeling for me of being sort-of like a guest at both.  As amazing as my mother was at making a house beautiful, and as welcoming and accommodating my father was when staying with him, when a family is separated, it’s not uncommon for a child to experience that separation within somehow.

 Perhaps some of the longing for rootedness for me also is the fact that since college, I’ve lived in 8 places in 7 years… the emotional challenges that come (especially for “highly sensitive people”) with having to adjust so often to a new environment, new community, unpacking and setting up a home in another new setting just to pack it up again a few months later… are very real!

Admittedly as well, maybe some of this longing is from the fact that God created me as a lover of all things “home”… I firmly believe it is the primary place, the physical dwelling of the family, where we are meant to be nurtured and develop and flourish.  I have always had an affinity for homemaking, beautifying, decorating, togetherness, etc.

Since growing more and more in my faith, I’ve learned that this longing inside for home is ultimately the universal desire placed in the human heart to find our Dwelling Place in God… that he created our hearts in love to yearn for Him, our Final and Eternal Home.

The significance of place

It has been very difficult for me at times, especially since having children, to be patient until we get to call a place our own.  Renting and living in an apartment (though I am truly truly grateful for our sweet little spot) makes me feel like I am still in a holding place… again, there is a longing for stronger permanency, stability, security that I belong in a place.  It’s not just the physical home that makes our place, but it is the people, the community, the friendships invested in around that home that we pour ourselves into.

Now I’ve wondered aloud, “’Should’ I even think this way?” All my therapist friends will want to comment at this point, “you should stop should-ing yourself!”. Yet I really have wondered: “well, what about missionaries? ….which I believe we all are meant to be in a sense… they by nature don’t usually have permanency in place, right? And what about the fact that Jesus didn’t have a place to lay his head when he was an adult and in ministry? He did visit home, though, if I remember correctly…”

Your Daddy has replied thoughtfully to my questions. “Place is extremely important, a God-given human need and desire… missionaries have an exceptional call to sacrifice this security.  Most people are called to a certain place.”

Being present

Our place right now is Minnesota, West of the Twin Cities. Never in my life could I have imagined this is where I would be!  But God knew. From before the beginning of time! Lady Lou, God knew you would be born here and forever be a native Minnesotan!  Miss Mae, He knew that you would love the snow as you do and flourish in your Montessori Children’s House!

When I receive God’s plan to be here- right now, with gratitude, my eyes are open to see all the wonders to behold here.  The beauty of the fullness of all the seasons. All the lakes. The kindness in the people and the respect and celebration of families through year-round outdoor festivals and community events.  The gift of the particular friendships He has ordained… we are super abundantly blessed with the other young families he has placed in our lives!

I am still praying that God will sometime soon gift us a home to call our own. Or grace us with some serious energy and grit to work our way there creatively.  I dream of being able to “plant some roots and some apple trees” as our wedding song goes… My mother’s heart wants for you girls “a house on a piece of land” where you can grow, play and commune with God in the delight of nature, a peaceful abode of love where you know you always belong, will always be seen and embraced as the cherished daughters you are.  I pray our future forever home will be a reference point for you girls, a joyful sign of God’s providence and ever-presence through the faithfulness and stability of the bond between your father and me.

I’m looking forward to building and expanding on this theme of place for you here at the place she made. And I’m going to ask your father to give a mini theology lesson for us on the topic when he is able to soon. He is so good at those.

So Much Love,

Momma

P.S. Helpful Tips

I thought I could briefly share some practical ways that I have found to help me embrace where God has me (especially when I have a hard time accepting it for one reason or another):

1. Keep a list of places you want to explore. Pull up google maps and write down parks, coffee shops, churches, hiking trails, libraries, restaurants, etc. that you see nearby. When you meet neighbors, share that you are new here and would love to check out their favorite spots and add those to your list.  Put stars next to your new favorite places, or transfer them to a new pretty list that you can put up and see often… and thank God for creating those places just for you, for knowing you would go there one day and delight in it. I can think of some amazing parks and coffee shops over the years, over all the places I’ve lived, where I knew God had me lovingly in mind!
2. Draw a map of your place. You can draw where your home is and then you can include your church, where you exercise, close friends’ homes, those favorite spots you listed above. Visuals help us see our stories from a different perspective, and they can be a beautiful reminder of the gift of where we are planted.
3. Buy Local Nature Guides. My favorite thing to do, especially if moving to a new state, is to buy the field guide for birds in that area. You can also find similar handbooks for flowers and trees. These help me learn and get excited about the specifics of the place. Example: Birds of Minnesota Field Guide
4. Make it your own, while it is yours. Find a few simple ways to intentionally participate in or make your mark on your home, even if you know it’s temporary. I know some perpetual renters who always paint a room a fun color if given permission. You can plant a tree or you can dive into volunteering somewhere local. Making a place your own can be as simple as getting that cute “Home Sweet Home” front door rug or hanging a wreath.

Embrace Your Place Free Templates

I made some printable templates for you! If you do make your own list or a map, I’d love to see it. Please tag #embracemyplace on instagram if you want to share! Sign up HERE to get access to your free template and other great intentional living resources.

Love, Serra Ann

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